While it appears like “little things” are making our children cry, it is not a little thing to them. You should rather acknowledge and understand your children’s feelings, help them interpret their emotions, and teach them to recognize how their feelings affect their behavior.
So the next time your child is upset, resist minimizing their feelings by saying, “It’s no big deal,” or “Stop crying”, “There’s no reason to get upset.” To them, it might be a big deal. Validate their emotions by saying, “I know you are really sad right now.”
Have you ever had your partner/spouse tell you to calm down when you’re in an angry rage? The very same effect happens on children when we use the phrase “Don’t Cry” when trying to soothe a child. Sometimes children cry because they simply forget to use their words, they don’t remember or know how to tell you.
Young children who are just learning to speak, often just need some help to say the problem out loud.
Henceforth, Correct behavior, not emotions.
Here are some comforting phrases you can say to your child to validate their feelings and get them to calm down
- I’m Listening
- I Can Tell This Is Hard For You
- It Is Ok To Be Sad
- Let’s Work This Out Together
- That was A Scary Situation! Are You Ok?
- It Doesn’t Seem Fair
- Can You Tell Me About It?
- I’m Here For You
- I Love You, You Are Safe
- Can You Help Me Understand Why You Are Crying?
- Silence While Hugging your Child
- If You Want To Be Alone, That Is Ok. I’ll Be Right Here When you’re Ready To Talk
Thanks for reading.
Hope you find this helpful?
If you’d like some more advice on keeping your teen’s education on track, have a read of our blog on how to set up homeschooling. For tips on managing everyone’s different needs, how to adjust homeschooling for kids of different ages has advice from a mum who’s in the thick of it.
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